"Thank heaven there is tomorrow. Because there is tomorrow, all our yesterdays have meaning and all our dreams have hope."

Friday, November 28, 2008

Almost . . . But Not Quite Yet

Only a girl who is crazy would actually post this kind of picture. So here I am . . . crazy and all.
Today Jason and I went to Valley Hospital for a Fetal Non-Stress Test. We have started the bi-weekly monitoring and since the doctor's office was closed today, an appointment was made for us to go to the hospital to have the NST done. Things were going well - I could feel the baby moving and the heart rate looked awesome. After about 30 minutes the nurse came in looking somewhat concerned and asked if I was feeling all the contractions I was having. With total embarrassment I told her no. She told me I had about five contractions in the 30 minutes I had been hooked up to the monitor. (FYI - she told me they consider pre term labor as 4 contractions in an hour at this gestation) She gave me a huge glass of water and said we would need to stay there until the contractions went away - or they would have to give me a shot to stop them.
Poor Jason. He looked at me and said, "Not again. I can't do the NICU again." Some urgent prayers were said; I gulped down the water and the contractions stopped in the hour that followed. A baby born at this age (almost 33 weeks) would most likely be fine, but it would also require some time in the NICU and neither of us are really up for that this time.
The nurse told me that this was very common in women who become pregnant within 18 months of giving birth - and that would be us. I was so embarrassed that I didn't realize I was having contractions - they just weren't hurting the way I remember. We are keeping a closer eye on things now and hopefully we can keep this little guy "in" for another month or so! We have another appointment this upcoming Monday - so we will see what the doctor says.

Happy Belated Birthday Becca!

I just realized I did this entry for my sister's birthday (November 8) and never posted it! UGH! I hate doing things like that! Sorry Becca-Boo I didn't forget you . . . I just have pregnancy brain and forgot to hit the publish button on the entry.

I still remember the day my sister Rebecca was born. I was in first grade and they announced over the loud speaker in our classroom that I had a new baby sister! My dad had called the school and asked them to let me know that mom had had Becca. I was so excited and couldn't wait to leave school to see my baby sister. I had so much fun dressing her up in my clothes - being a big sister is the best!

I love my sister so much. I have talked about her many times on the blog . . . but I just want her to know how much she means to me and how much I love her. Happy Birthday Becca-Boo!

Monday, November 24, 2008

Why I Love Living In Vegas . . .

Today I listened to Christmas music in the car while I had the air conditioning on!
Lovin' Vegas Weather!

Tuesday, November 18, 2008

An Empty Room

The nursery in our home used to look like this . . . and this . . .
. . . and now it is void of all baby stuff. It's an empty room with a lot of crap in it. I'm so tempted to bring all the stuff back and prepare for this little guy - but I think it would break me if I ever had to pack it up again.
Do I take the chance and bring the baby stuff back?
Or do I hold off and work on the room after he gets here?

Sunday, November 16, 2008

The Other Jason In My Life

We went to the Jason Mraz concert this weekend with Jason's brother and sister and we had a BLAST. It was actually the best concert I have been to in a long time. He was surprisingly funny and kept us all entertained - including the baby who danced the whole time too. :)
I have a whole new love for Mr. A-Z. Can't get enough of the Geek in the Pink.

Monday, November 10, 2008

7 Months Done!!

Here is the monthly picture. YIKES!!
I know I am so nerdy for posting these. I'm just happy that the baby is still growing! It's a sign that things are looking good.
We are now officially done with seven months of pregnancy - only about ten weeks left.Done with 7 months! YAY!

Saturday, November 8, 2008

Up Close and Personal with Baby Bailey

Today we had a 4D ultrasound done at our perinatologist's office. Jason and I were quite nervous as we knew what facial deformities we would be looking for. But . . . it ended up being a wonderfully peaceful visit. This little guy moved all over the whole time and he has now turned into the "head down" position. The best part of the whole visit was to watch him move his face, yawn, smile and making sucking faces. The tech commented on how expressive his face was . . . and I realized that that was a tender mercy to see his range of facial movements. He even stuck his tongue out at us and "blew kisses". Of course, our nerves won't be completely calmed until we are holding this little monkey in our arms - but we have one more thing to be grateful for. I can't believe how much I already love him!

I know ultrasound pictures are always a little difficult to decipher . . . but I think these ones turned out pretty good.

Friday, November 7, 2008

Just Because . . .

. . . I am crazy about him today.Just thought he should know.

Wednesday, November 5, 2008

Beautiful Irony

I started writing this last week, but it was too difficult to complete. Here is my second attempt:Gavin James Bailey's baby blessing. October 27, 2007 at Primary Children's Medical Center.

Last Monday - October 27, 2008 - I laid in bed remembering all that was happening on that night one year ago. My mind wandered to that night where I laid in a hospital bed holding my baby boy who was in the process of drifting off to Heaven. I held him in my arms and Jason wrapped us both in his. My heart broke as the three of us laid there together that night - and as I reflected on those last few hours it was like a time machine of emotions. All of those same feelings came back. Jason and I talked about the memories of that night. The good and the difficult as well. We both came to the conclusion that the peace we felt overshadowed the pain that night. Still, this year I cried as I thought about that night and the emptiness that we now feel without our sweet baby Gavin here.
As we talked about last year, we received a tender mercy. I felt our new little boy kick and squirm all over. Jason and I spent the rest of the evening feeling this new little life kick and move. I can't believe how much I already love him!

It amazes me how Heavenly Father takes and gives. We have been told that we will get back more than is ever taken away. I like to think that Gavin's return to Him was a joint effort between the four of us.

It just felt a bit ironic remembering the night Gavin left us while I felt this new sweet boy kick and remind us that happiness will happen again. There is a quote from Elder Jeffrey R. Holland that says, "You have had happiness and you will again." I think he is right.

Tuesday, November 4, 2008

I Love My Life

Every first Sunday of the month our church has a Fast and Testimony meeting. During this hour, members of our congregation can speak and bear their testimony of the truthfulness of the gospel and how they have learned certain doctrine and principles to be true for themselves.

I was walking the halls of the church on Sunday with a little boy (who was being a slight distraction in our class) when I overheard a testimony of a girl in the ward after us. I know this sweet girl. She is a few years older than I am and we grew up together for a majority of our childhood years. She was born with Downs Syndrome and has been a joy in the lives of many. She always had a smile on her face a a practical joke to play on anyone who wasn't watching her closely. We just love her.

As I listened to her testimony I was overwhelmed with the love that this sweet girl has for her family - especially her mother. She said, "And I love my mother. She is the most beautiful mother in the world." I know her mother as well - and she IS a beautiful and wonderful mother. I know that her daughter could see into her mother's heart and find the beauty that is there.

As she concluded her testimony she said, "I love my life." I couldn't help but feel the tears well up in my eyes. I am sure when her mom and dad first found that their daughter had Downs Syndrome they were concerned about her quality of life. I know I was very overwhelmed with fear and concern when I was told that my son would not lead a normal, healthy life. These parents have been more than amazing examples to me in my life and they have made their daughter's life a beautiful example to so many as well.

As her words rang over and over in my head I hope that my baby Gavin could say the same thing. There really is nothing I would love more than to hear him tell us that he loves us and that he loves his life.

I want to love life like this girl does. She finds joy in everything. I am trying to find that too.

Saturday, November 1, 2008

Halloween at Disneyland

In February my dad told us that he was pretty sure Gavin would want us to spend Halloween weekend in Disneyland this year. :) This last week has been an emotional roller coaster for our family and Disneyland happened to be a great way to escape reality and have some fun with family and friends.
We spent most of the day on Friday with Jason's brother, sister in law and their kids who had already been at Disneyland for a few days. We had so much fun with them. The very best part of the day was when Jason was holding our youngest nephew who looked up at Jason and said, "Uncle Jason, I just pooped!" HAHAHA! Jason totally freaked out and I couldn't stop laughing as I reminded Jason that our nephew was wearing a diaper.
Saturday we spent the day with our Mortensen cousins at Disney's California Adventure Park. I had to sit out most rides and my seven year old cousin informed me that he was really glad he wasn't a girl cause he never wants to "deal with that pregnancy nonsense." HA!
It was a really fun weekend and it's our last get away until this baby gets here!

I was actually allowed to ride Dumbo!

Matt, Becca, Jason and my big fat pregnant self.

All of the Mortensen Grandchildren