The holidays aren't an easy time when you are missing someone. Last year was such a blur - I don't remember much about it at all. Maybe that is a blessing . . . but this year the holidays have been filled with mixed emotions for me. We are truly grateful and excited to have another little boy in the next few weeks, but the pain of not having my son here is sometimes all to raw and real.
It's hard to gather as a family, laugh and joke while knowing that there should have been a little 18 month boy with crazy blond hair running around and getting excited for Christmas. I miss him. However, I am so grateful for the promise of eternal families. It is the one thing that I can hold to during these lonely days without him here. The knowledge that he is our son forever is a blessing I treasure most.